Tuesday, June 9, 2009

I sit and wonder

Have you ever just sat and wondered about the path you have taken in life and the choices you have made?

I have been doing that alot lately, and I am struggling with the results. I never dreamed that I would be having the life that I have right now.. It is so weird how things are so different in reality then they are when we day dream. I always dreamed for a better life for myself, don't get me wrong I had a good childhood, my mom was a single mother of 3 and she provided for us kids. But as a child I always swore that I would have a great job and better things and money to pay bills and buy food, also marry a man and stay married to that man forever. Wow was I way off....

I did get married and had a sort of good life, I had family and friends to help me out when I needed it. Then all of a sudden my mother was gone and I felt all alone and scared to death. The guy I thought was so wonderful, turned out to be a cheater. Soon after my grandma past away and now I was all alone... I struggled for awhile and realized I needed to end the marriage and move on. The great job I always dreamed about was not there and so there was no money.

I met a guy and thought he was going to be my prince charming and give me the life I always dreamed about that was way off too.

I now live in a 2 bedroom apt and it is tiny as heck and have to bust my butt working 3 jobs to even survive. I wonder where did I go wrong? And is there a chance I can still be happy?


  1. Hi Netty....

    You know sometimes in our lives, we think the paths we choose will lead us to "gold" and it only took us to places that hopefully help us learn the lessons in life.

    I sort of can relate to what you are saying. It makes sense. So how do we know when we are making the right choices and not using poor judgement? At the moment it all seem so right...right?!

    I heard a statement from a movie recently that had me thinking and yet had to laugh because it was true...."if you want to see the Lord laugh, just tell Him what your plans are."

    I've learn to let God plan my paths. But first I must trust that He will do the the best for me even if I many not agree with His plans.

    I guess its a matter of putting our faith and trust in Him. Let Him lead. Let Him guide. And He WILL take you to places in your life that is beyond the path of gold.

    Hope that made sense!

    Lots of safe hugz!
    A Mom's Joureny

  2. Welcome to blogging! There is absolutely a chance for you to be happy, try to focus on the positives as much as you can!!